This album was really hard for me to write. I wanted to write something that confronted the hardest challenges of life as a trans woman. I wanted to write something that encapsulated my never ending indignation at the binary world around me. I wanted to give myself a platform that no-one could take away to shout about the hardest parts of being trans.
And that was hard! That kept me in a dark place, often mulling over some of the worst transphobia I have faced. Writing this album was intense and emotional laborious.
So about halfway through the writing process, I sat down one day to just play with some synths and relax. I sat down to try to remind myself that music is a happy thing for me, that it is a place for me to escape the problems of this world. I sat down one day wanting to just melt away into some beautiful arpeggiated filter sweeps.
So here, have an ambient jam that I performed 9 or 12 times before I ever even attempted recording it. I needed a break halfway through the album, and I feel you may too.
So take a moment and breathe. Breathe and reflect on how wonderful and hard it is to be prideful.